Tonight

Seventeen years ago
I entered
the Valley of the Shadow.

Somewhere in the hospital
was my newborn
rushed to first breath
by emergency methods.

But the idea of delivery
was lost in the fog
of my fragile existence...
perhaps it had been a boy after all.

A world did not revolve beyond 
my isolated, curtained room.
Yet I understood their warning words,
falling with weight out of the dark;
so I was still,
very still,
waiting.

Even now, at times, I'll wake
with the terror of dying!
But those days that were nights
were all peace for me;
perfect
sustaining
precious 
Christ
peace.

Every year
we recall,
telling the story
over and over--
every breath-catching
detail.

How I love to remember...

Remember
God's sense of humor,
to have my mid-wife 
search for her wallet
just long enough
to meet up with me.
And then find that she was 
sitting on it the whole time!

Remember
How Hero named 
his newborn by himself
and bonded dearly 
as he held her
every long, lonely hour.

Remember
two dear, common, overlooked saints,
literally up for hours
the night I reached the brink;
pleading mercy from God
for a girl 
they barely knew.

Remember
how close I came to Dying.

Life's frequent troubles;
it's fatigue, heartache, joint pain,
lyme-bearing ticks and difficult choices,
mask the joy, 
mud-up the gift.
It's so good to think back, 
for it seems I must
look again 
at Death
to remember how to truly live.

Happy Birthday Blaze!
Happy Birthday LIFE!

Love you all,
Zinnia Girl


You are my hiding place;
You will protect me from trouble
and surround me with 
songs of deliverance!
Psalm 32:7